Love covers many wrongs, but not all wrongs. If you continue to say or do negative things that hurt your partner, you will lose him when he’s had enough. Are you in a long-term relationship that is about to end because of something you said? Does your Partner always walk away from you after you make a particular statement?
Then, you might have been saying some things you should never say to your boyfriend. This article shows you things you should never say in a relationship because they are harmful to your partner.
Read them to the end to see which ones you’ve been saying.
1. If you won’t do this, I’ll leave you.
One of the things you should never do to your boyfriend is to give him an ultimatum. A relationship filled with ultimatums is bound to fail because it is mostly conditional. If you don’t like the guy too much, just leave him. If you don’t, he will eventually get tired of your ultimatums and leave you.
2. Your gym subscription is a waste.
One of the things you should never say to a man is to imply that he isn’t working hard enough on his body. It is the same thing as him calling you fat or thin. Would you like it if he makes a snide remark about your body?
If you worshipped the physique of the men in your past relationships, that doesn’t mean you should disrespect your present partner because he doesn’t have the physique you desire.
3. You don’t deserve an answer.
If you can’t ever see past your anger in your relationship, you will never get anything resolved. No matter how mad at him you are, communicate with your partner level-headedly. If you say this to him, he will use it against you in the future, and you won’t like it either.
4. You’re no good in bed.
One of the things you should never say to a man is that he is bad in bed, even if it’s true. Except he treats you shabbily in bed, this statement will only cripple him emotionally and physically. This kind of talk will most likely end the relationship too.
You can address your sexual frustration more diplomatically and sensitively.
5. You promised to accept me as I am.
If you use this statement only when it suits you, you’re being manipulative. It is bad to excuse your terrible actions when saying sorry would have been the right thing to do. If your partner doesn’t love you for who you are, you wouldn’t be in the relationship.
6.Do you even still love me? If you always take your boyfriend's consideration to heart, you might say or do things that sound silly sometimes. One of them is asking him if he still loves you after every argument. This question can lead to another round of back and forth and will bare your insecurities to him. It is easy for him to take advantage of your insecurity and mess with your mind occasionally.
7. It’s obvious I mean little to you.
Unless he treats you with complete disrespect, this is one of the things you should never say to him. It is hurtful to him because it suggests that you don’t trust his love for you. It means you doubt his commitment to the relationship. Don’t speak immaturely in the heat of the moment just to hurt him, it will backfire.
8. You’ve never been good at it, why bother now?
This comment is an insult that doesn’t help your partner in a bad situation. What do you have to obtain by telling your boyfriend to his face that he failed before he even started? Rubbing salt on his injury will not toughen him as you assume. It will only create animosity in your relationship.
9. I wish you were as ripped as my ex.
Comparing your current partner with your previous boyfriend is a juvenile thing to do. If you wish to have a ripped partner, you should go date one, or suggest it more nicely to your boyfriend.
10. I can never forgive you for this.
If you still act resentful after he does his best to prove he’s remorseful, it will raise a red flag in your boyfriend’s mind. It will make him think you’re unforgiving and will always hold him ransom because of one error. If you don’t trust him again, break up with him instead of torturing both of you.
11. You talk too much.
Saying your partner talks too much means you want to shut him up. If he gets a bit self-absorbed sometimes, sweetly tell him that you have something to say too. However, never tell him he talks too much. It’s the same as telling him to shut up.
12. Are you sure you’re a real man?
It is critical that you watch how you word your statements in relationships. There are some forbidden phrases you shouldn’t mistakenly say in your relationship. Implying that your man is impotent or incapable of carrying out his duties is one of them. He would never hear anything you have to say after that statement because you’ve just tried to unman him.
13. Go off yourself!
You might say the words were harmless because you said them in anger, but they’re one of the things you should never say to your boyfriend. If you say it once, he can excuse your temper, but when it becomes a common phrase you use, he will withdraw from you.
Such phrases will create a barrier between you and your boyfriend, especially if he's ever had mental health problems, including suicidal thoughts.
14. I just hate you sometimes.
In a relationship, a couple should complete each other’s phrases, not fight because of the other person’s statement. Saying you hate your partner is a heat-of-the-moment thing to say, but it doesn’t lessen the negative impact of such words. Soon enough, your partner will start believing the statement, especially if the relationship doesn’t improve.
15 You’re the one with the problem.
This is one of the phrases you should never use in a relationship because it makes you look irresponsible. Only people who never take responsibility for their actions say other people are the problem instead of sharing the blame. Even if you aren’t at fault, don’t act like you’re perfect.
16. Loosen up!
Another example of phrases you should avoid is telling your partner to loosen up when he’s trying to correct you. Bad habits aren’t cool, especially when they hurt other people. If your partner is advising you on a wrong move you made, telling him to loosen up means he is stuck up and uncool. He might leave you to go down the path of destruction after many tries.
17. You have become boring.
You most likely say this when your partner is in a different headspace. The statement itself isn’t bad, but the context of the situation is what matters. He will take this statement as negative if it appears that you aren’t giving any consideration to his current mood.
18. You embarrass me.
Partners embarrass each other sometimes, it’s a part of being human. However, if you cannot keep a lid on your anger, especially in public, your relationship won’t last long. No boyfriend will intentionally embarrass his girlfriend. So, that should be your first thought when you think your feel embarrassed by your partner’s actions.
19. You’re blowing things out of proportion.
Even if you didn’t mean any harm, you might still do some harm with this statement. You might not attach importance to everything your partner does, but you shouldn’t discard his worries either. His cautiousness might even save you from harm if you just listen to him first. Don’t be in a hurry to dismiss whatever he says.
20. You will always need me.
Even if you want to mother him and make him feel loved in the relationship, this is the wrong way to go about it. He can wake up tomorrow and decide he doesn’t need you anymore. What then? Using this statement makes you sound obsessive, which is uncool.
21. Give me some money.
A relationship where the man is generous is good. However, if you act like you’re entitled to his money, you’ll lead him to think you don’t care about him beyond what you can get from him.
If you need his help financially, ask nicely and do so sparingly. You don’t want him thinking you see him as your ATM.
Credit; Elvis Onuigbo